Party

So I was one of those early birds at the beach the other day (I've noticed there are more of us now) you know... with some friends talking about "last night's party" and one of them who was reading a book said: "let me read you something" and continued: "it's funny..." I said: "ok" and I thought it was funny, so I thought I'd share it with you:

CELEBRATE WITHOUT TEARS.

...In fact, just planning to have fun is enough to ensure getting bored. The ideal would therefore be to renounce all celebrations. Unfortunately, the party animal is a figure so well respected that this renunciation could result in a weakening of the social image. The following tips should help to avoid the worst (staying alone until the end, in a state of boredom evolving into despair, with the mistaken impression that the others are having fun).

Be well aware beforehand that the party will necessarily fail. Visualize the examples of past failures. (LOL!!*) This does not mean to adopt a cynical and jaded attitude. On the contrary, humble and cheerful acceptance of the common disaster can lead to success: transforming a failed party into a pleasant occasion of banality.

Always anticipate coming home alone, in a taxi.

Before the party: drink. Alcohol in moderate doses produces a socializing and euphoric effect which has no real competition.

During the party: drink, but lower the doses... It is more thoughtful to take ½ of a Valium at the right time. Alcohol compounding the effect of tranquilizers will make you sleepy; that’s the time to call a taxi. A good party is a short party.

After the party: call to offer your thanks. Wait quietly for the next occasion (an interval of one month, which can shorten to a week during vacations).

Finally, a consoling perspective: with the help of aging, the obligation to party diminishes; the penchant for solitude increases; real life takes over.


Extract from Michel Houellebecq's book, Interventions.
Photo: Chivas party in Punta del Este, Uruguay, the other night, taken with my mobile phone.
* that's a personal comment